The Shadow of Your Wings

I will choose to listen and believe the Voice of Truth.

I choose Life.

* Andrea Brooke ~ August 14, 1990 - July 20, 2004 ... our sweet girl.

ROAD LESS TRAVELED

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth

Then took the other as just as fair
And having perhaps the better claim
Because it was grassy and wanted wear
Though as for that, the passing there
Had worn them really about the same

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet, knowing how way leads onto way
I doubted if I should ever come back

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence
Two roads diverged in a wood
And I took the one less traveled by
And that has made all the difference


Robert Frost

Oh what I would do to have

the kind of faith it takes

to climb out of this boat I’m in

onto the crashing waves

To step out of my comfort zone

into the realm of the unknown where Jesus is

and He’s holding out His hand

But the waves are calling out my name

and they laugh at me

reminding me of all the times

I’ve tried before and failed

The waves they keep on telling me

time and time again, “Boy, you’ll never win!”

“You’ll never win.”

But the voice of truth tells me a different story

The voice of truth says, “Do not be afraid!”

The voice of truth says, “This is for My glory.”

Out of all the voices calling out to me

I will choose to listen and believe the voice of truth.

(from “Voice of Truth” by Casting Crowns)

1 of 4 a song, a poem, a prayer, and a dream

An article in the most recent issue of a favorite magazine has impressed such a picture on my mind that I want to share it. The author is writing about intercessory prayer and the idea of such prayers “moving mountains.” *

“You will know them by their fruit.” Mt 7:16-20

We quote this verse almost as frequently as John 3:16. And misquote or misrepresent it nearly as often. For whatever reasons we tend to think this verse says, “Judge them by their fruit.” I’ve heard preachers and lay people refer to themselves as “fruit inspectors” more times than I can count. Inspectors, by training and job description, do indeed “judge” the fruit. Each crate is examined, samplings tested for ripeness, damage incurred during transit, insect “burns,” etc. and then the load is classified or valued accordingly. Judged.

For years I labored under this concept, that our good works and deeds were the fruit by which we were known, and judged. I struggled, strained, worked, fretted and always came away feeling frustrated and empty. I couldn’t do enough, or do well enough to meet my own expectations of productivity, much less others or, I feared, God’s.

Finally, late one night, I came before the Lord and confessed my inadequacies and inability. As I stood in the silence, my head bowed, fully expecting the ax to fall (Mt 3:10) and believing that I deserved such a fate I heard that still, small Voice ask, “What fruit do you think I am seeking from you?” “Oh, Lord,” I whimpered, “You know. That I should pray more, give more, DO more for You.” For a moment the only sound was that of the night … I waited, not in fear or even expectation; my soul as quiet and still as the darkness that surrounded me. Then He spoke gently to my heavy heart, “Child, the fruit I seek is that of the Spirit ~ that you bear My love, peace, patience, goodness …”

I was led to understand that without the ripening of His fruit in my life there could be no meaningful or lasting ministry, that my good works would be only that - MY good works. But that by the increase of the Holy Spirit, of His fruitfulness upon and within me, the good works would begin to fall as surely as apples in autumn, a natural by-product of Spirit’s presence.

I’d like to share the results (my own paraphrase) of a word study I did during this time on the verses in Galatians:

Our poodle pup, Pippa, loves to “go.” We have to spell or silently mouth the word around her - to speak it out brings on a joyful response that causes even her curls to bounce with excitement. Bring out the leash and she is completely undone with anticipation. It’s hilarious and adorable to behold.

One early morning during our recent trip to Arkansas I rose with the dawn. Peeking out the door of our RV I saw that the sun was just lighting the Ouachita sky. A storm was brewing across the valley and slowly moving up the hill - the sweet mountain air fresh and chilled with mist. Like Pip, I could hardly contain myself as I prepared a quick cup of tea, taking care not to wake my little family. I needed to be alone for a few precious minutes, and the beauty of the morning was just too incredible to share with any other than God. I reached for the dog’s leash, shushing her into something resembling submission, clicked it onto her collar and stepped out, trying desperately to control an oh so excited dog with one hand, and a steaming cup in the other. A few steps from the trailer Pip and I both breathed deeply as we walked toward a little field in the center of the park. My tiny dog pulling hard on the lead, the cup threatening to splash microwave hot tea on me I took a quick glance around, saw no human or dog (or bear) and dropped the leash. Poor puppy had been tethered to the thing for a week, I thought she would relish the opportunity to run free for a moment ~ “Run, puppy, run. You’re free!” I said to her with quiet glee. But she didn’t run. In fact, she stopped in her tracks, turned to me with a quizzical look as if to ask if I was aware that I’d just released her. I laughed, “It’s ok, Pippa, go, run, play!” She sat. Just sat down in the damp grass, and looked out to the open field. I stepped forward, she rose and took exactly as many steps as I, but did not leave my side or move beyond the length that the lead would have held her. Curious behavior. I was about to lean down to unsnap the leash, thinking it inhibited her, when I had one of those “ahhh ha!” moments.

The revelation I had that early mountain morn returned to mind a few days ago. I was praying for a dear lady who struggles with sin in her life. Sin long since confessed, forsaken, and forgiven by God - but not by self. As I came before the Lord, asking Him to release her from her past the Spirit reminded me of what He had revealed that morning, and I was thrilled with another “Ahhh. Ha!” as I praised God for His wondrous grace and goodness, for making things so simple and clear that even I can understand.

When the sin and shame that binds us is suddenly released by the mercy of God we, like my puppy, are unsure, uncertain in and of our freedom. We know the enemy no longer controls us, but we still feel the clutch of the collar and the burden of the chain dragging behind us. Perhaps we immediately recognize that our tether has gone slack and begin to run and frolic in the field of our liberty, only to be caught up by a bramble or broken branch and jerked back into thinking we are yet held fast. Or we may, like Pip, just plop down at the point we were released, not truly understanding what has been done for us, or how to respond to it.

Listen to the words of the Lord, “The Spirit of the LORD is upon Me, because He has anointed Me … to proclaim liberty to the captives, … to set free those who are oppressed.” (Lu 4:18) In, and because of Christ Jesus we are no longer held by the hand of the enemy. The One who now controls us does so with a tether of love and mercy. It is His voice and Spirit that lead us - without chains. “For whom the Son sets free is free indeed.”

I can almost hear His laughter as He proclaims to our souls, “Run, little one, you’re free!” and I sense His sorrow when we just sit there, as if we were still bound, not fully comprehending our freedom.

I was thumbing through a catalog this morning and saw a gift I’d like to send to those of you who will survive, who are fighting faithfully, and finding grace in your moments with God …

I cannot, of course, send the bracelet, but I share with you the words engraved upon it. You, Lynn, Gloria, and Sharon, are beautiful, living proof of the truth of this inscription:

What Cancer Cannot Do …

It cannot invade the soul, suppress memories, kill friendship, destroy peace, conquer the spirit, shatter hope, cripple love, corrode faith, steal eternal life, silence courage.

Blessings in Christ,

paula

Mt 6:14,15 “… if you forgive men for their transgressions, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men, then your Father will not forgive your transgressions.”

I’ve been thinking a lot about forgiveness lately. 70 x 7. I remember reading a Chinese proverb years ago that comes to mind often -

“Forgiving the unrepentant is like drawing stick figures on the water.”

At first thought one realizes it is a futile effort, but when held to Christ’s light it gleams with the truth of seventy times seven … over and over and over. That is the gift and grace of forgiveness.

When my sister and I were kids our dad would end arguments between us by making us tell each other we were sorry, “Sorreeee,” and then requiring us to “Kiss and make up.” “EEEWWWWW!” Didn’t help us learn much about forgiveness, but it did effectively bring an end to the tension as we burst into giggles and tossed a run by kiss in the other’s direction.

So, let’s see how this works … “Sorreee.” “Forgive me.” Wow - totally different attitude. The first claims no responsibility, is in truth a thoughtless, childish gesture offered without repentance. The second is a humble admission of wrongdoing and a plea that things be made right.

Which most accurately portrays my approach to God? Which should reflect our attitude of apology to others? Are we so secure in our relationship with the Lord, or our parents, children, siblings, friends that we think a quick “sorry” tossed their way will automatically insure forgiveness? Do we even recognize our need to be forgiven? Or the other person’s desire to forgive?

It occurs to me that there is a flip side to this proverb: Repenting before the unforgiving is like drawing stick figures on the water. hmmm …..

I seem to spend a lot of time sketching on the pond, forgiving those who have no thought of repenting or even apologizing, expressing my sorrow to those who don’t want to forgive. Lead me beside the still waters, Lord. Restore my soul,” and my peace, and my joy.

What a precious gift it is to be able to “come boldly” to the throne of God, knowing He will forgive, and forget my sins toward Him when I humbly ask. Trusting completely that in Christ I am forgiven, not because I deserve it or can expect it, but because He loves me, faithfully, truly, fully. “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” (1 Jo 1:9) How I thank You, Lord.

I saw a t-shirt a while back that had me LOL. A simple black number with bold white letters stating:

Sadly, the person I would have worn it for would never have “gotten the message.” She would have laughed but never realized it was meant for her, and besides, it was rude. (True, but rude.) So I decided that the $17.95 plus S&H could be better spent elsewhere - like on caller id for my phone so I can choose not to answer when I’m not up for listening. (I know, none of you ever do that. Just give me the Miss Non-congeniality award now and let’s get on with the pageant.)

I had another “friend” once who told me that when she started thumbing through her issues that she didn’t want my advice or even prayer, “just nod like the little bobble head doggie folks use to put in the back window of their cars.” I send her a Christmas card each year. That’s the extent of our relationship now. We seem to be content with that.

Truth is, we all have issues, and need a friend who will just listen. My husband snorts and shakes his head when he overhears some of my phone “conversations,” which consist of little more than, “uh huh,” “hmmm,” “Oh yeah, I get it.” He knows that I will be totally bummed out when I finally hang up. I’ve managed to get a little control over others’ issues with a caller id and having given away the cordless phone. I can honestly say, “I’ve gotta go, gotta go right now!” and am able to get off the line. (And with the amount of tea I drink the caller has no doubt that I’ve really “gotta go!”)

OK, tmi.

I’ve been thinking about that t-shirt again, though. Wondering if I can have it made with the printing in reverse - so that I can stand in front of the mirror and get the message to myself! I’ve grown weary of my own issues! I’ve tried being “spiritual” about it, like King David asking, “Why so downcast, o my soul?” Alas, my soul answereth me not. My mind, however, screams - Well, he does this, and she did that … Perhaps that is the cry of my soul. I’ve even tried installing a mental caller id - checking each ring of thought and “bringing it into captivity to the obedience of Christ.” (2 Cor 10:5) To be honest, that doesn’t always work so well either - like grabbing the phone out of habit before looking at who’s calling. I just get stuck with the conversation until I can manage a polite excuse to hang up. Bobble head me.

When I do offer advice to a friend regarding an issue it is most often to remind her that if she can’t change the situation she can at least change the way she responds to it. Someone recently shot back a tearful, “HOW? How do I respond to his thoughtlessness, her selfishness?” I could only answer quietly, “With grace.” “Oh,” she replied, “that’s fine for them! But I’M the one who has to live with the hurt! How do I respond to THAT?”  The Someone was my Self, and I have no answer.

What do you do with issues that just keep coming, piling up, when you can’t cancel your subscription?

David’s response was to “Hope in God, for I shall yet praise Him for the help of HIS countenance … Therefore I will remember You … The LORD will command His lovingkindness … Vindicate me, O God, and plead my cause … deliver me … For You are the God of my strength … Oh, send out Your light and Your truth! Let them lead me; let them bring me to Your holy hill and to Your tabernacle. Then I will go to the altar of God, to God my exceeding joy; and on the harp I will praise You, O God, my God. … Hope in God; for I shall yet praise Him, the help of my countenance and my God.” (Psalms 42,43)

Jesus’ answer would be, “… seventy times seven.”

uh huh … Are you listening, o my soul?!